Monday, July 21, 2008

Lesson 2

Sometimes the best thing to do is just to say exactly what's in your heart.
J.D. (Zach Braff) on [Scrubs]

Here's the second installment...

Lesson 2: Sometimes the best thing to do is just to say exactly what's in your heart.

I took one of those personality type tests. It confirmed what I already knew about myself. For the most part, I stay away from conflict. I'm more of a peace-maker. I can handle it in my professional life. If I need to do speak up or ruffle feathers, I can do and will do so. My personal life, however, is a different story.

I terribly dislike confrontations where someone's feelings may get hurt. It's easier for me to be silent and not say anything. I joke around with my friends, telling them that one of my spiritual gifts is the ability to ignore people. That skill helped me a lot when I was a high school sports official.

It's pretty easy for me to deflect comments made by other people, especially if I do not consider them a close friend or acquaintance. It's harder for me, though, with persons to whom I am particular familiar or close. I will leave submerged my own feelings and thoughts at times.

I also realize that because of my childhood, I find it difficult to be close to certain people. And when I finally become close, it takes an extra effort to truly open up to that person. The good thing is that I have identified that characteristic of mine. Now, I have to try to remedy it.

I would like to say that I see myself as a solutions-oriented type of guy. So I've been trying to identify those persons and/or situations where I am hesitant to speak m heart. The one underlying feature to these circumstances and with the whole concept of speaking from the heart, is that you leave yourself exposed and vulnerable. Others are able to see what you believe. What you value. What you feel and treasure. They can see what's important to you. What your weaknesses are. Where the chinks in your armor are located.

Whether it's in an argument. A conflict. A sorrow. A rejection. A disappointment. When you speak your heart, people see you as you are. Not the you kept in check and under lock and key.

But sometimes what's in your heart doesn't edify those around you. The heart at times can hurtful and spiteful and jealous and deceitful. Jesus tells us that.

So you have to find the balance. That's easier said than done. Until next time...

Continue In Excellence,
jdmerx






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